For the 'students' of UWWC

2006-09-05T04:49:00.000-07:00

Chapter 3.3

Different terms and definations.

Crapist- a person who talks crap.
Crapper- a person who studies crap.
Crapology- the subject of learning crap.
Craptilism- the art of crap.
Anti-crap- people against crap.
Crapping- the verb for talking crap.

2006-07-02T20:28:00.000-07:00

Chapter 3.2

Improving Crapping Skills

Besides practising on your crapping skills, you may want to mix around with crappy friends as you may be able to absorb some crap from them.
Listening to more crappy jokes will sharpen your crapping skills and help you to develop thinking skills.

You can improvise some lame jokes. For example, " why did the chicken cross the road?" The usual answer should be: "it wanted to get over to the other side ".
But, the answer can be improved. For example, " it wanted to commit suicide"
Any lame answer is enough to make people go -.-'''

-End Of Lesson-

2006-05-18T21:07:00.000-07:00

Results announced

Ranking Name of candidate Score Comments
1. Lee Jia Hui 49/50 Effective use of crap.
2. Yi Zhen 47/50 Good use of crap but a
little serious.
3. Cecilia Lim 46/50 Some questions are
answered by wrong
techniques.

The rest of the marks will be updated much later.

2006-05-17T04:57:00.000-07:00

Announcement

Common test re-take

Please inform me or leave a comment to take the re test.

Pupils taking the re-test: Cecilia, Priscilla, Jia Hui

2006-05-13T05:27:00.000-07:00

Announcements

1. All lessons will stop due to the coming Common Test.
2. Registrations for the Common Test has stopped.
3. Eligible candidates are: Yizhen
Shelley
Shi Ting
Exam date: 14th May 2006
Lessons will resume on the 15th of May, 2006.

Unsuccessful candidates may wait for other announcements after the exam.
Thank you.

2006-05-11T01:57:00.000-07:00

Announcement

UWWC first common test (beginners crapology test) will be held on the 14th of May 2006.

Topics tested: Chapters 1 to 2

All answer scripts must be handed in by 7pm on the 14th of May.
Or else, the late scripts will not be accepted. The exam scripts will be e-mailed to all candidates on 14th May.

Candidates who wish to take the examination must register by 13th May (tomorrow) .

Please register by leaving your comments on this posting. All candidates must hand in their application forms by 13th May. This is an important test as it will determine if you can get into the intermediate courses.

2006-05-11T01:33:00.000-07:00

Chapter 3.1

Understanding more basics on crapology.

After learning on how to crack lame jokes, we shall begin to learn more on how to be a more professional joker. For example, you can create more lame jokes that goes round and round to irritate people.

But, please do not offend people. Crapology is meant for fun. So while being crappy, you still have to be sensible. Control the crappiness on your jokes and think twice before you tell someone the joke. If the person cannot take such jokes, do not crack that joke on him. Tell him other kinds of jokes that will not offend him.

Take note of all important informations from all lessons.

--End of lesson--

2006-04-29T01:48:00.000-07:00

Chapter 2.2

How to get to a better level of humour.

After you have mastered the technique as mentioned in the last post, try doing this. Think up of your own lame and crappy stuff that make people go -.-''' or X).
For example, you may send people messages once in a while like this: Hilo Ailo Bilo Cilo Dilo Eilo Filo Gilo Hilo Iilo Jilo Kilo Lilo Milo Nilo Oilo Pilo Qilo Rilo Silo Tilo Uilo Vilo Wilo Xilo Yilo Zilo.

Do some crappy actions in a while ( take note. Only once in a while ) People will only feel that it is funny when they see such unusual actions once a while.

--End Of Lesson--

2006-04-28T04:57:00.000-07:00

Chapter 2.1

How to prepare yourself for crappiness.

As beginners, you would most likely lose control of yourself when you tell a joke. So the technique is to look as serious as possible and think of something serious. If you are professional enough, it will not be a problem and it will be natural for you to be serious even if you tell a joke. Try to be natural.

Another matter to take note. 大便= Crap= Nonsense. So, 大便 indirectly equals to nonsense. When you are being told a joke, you just have to act according to situation. If the joke is lame, give this -.-''' look. If the joke is funny, laugh crappily.

Before telling any crappy stuff ( begginers), do some warm up exercises.Stretch your face and your mind. You will feel calmer this way. Remember to source for jokes or it will be more creative to invent your own.

--End Of Lesson 2.1--

2006-04-28T04:50:00.000-07:00

Announcement:

UWWC First Common Test ( Theory Level 1 )
Date: 9th of June 2006 / 10th of June 2006 ( you may choose between these two
dates)
Topics tested: Chapter 1 and Chapter 2. Further ammendments will be announced.

Attendance is compulsary. This will be counted into your mid-year examination.

2006-04-27T00:45:00.000-07:00

Chapter 2

How to be crappy ( Beginners ).

The secret to being crappy is to have an excellent sense of humour. To have that, you must first be able to tell lame jokes. Remember and take note that when you tell a joke, you must not laugh no matter how funny it is. This makes the joke funnier . Also note that the most simple and crappy actions are the most advanced ones.

Before you can master that, you must first be able to master this beginners' technique. Practice this on your siblings and neighbours or on me( I'm immune to it ) and see if you are able to make them laugh and feel irritated at the same time. If you are able to do so, congratulations. You have passed your grade 1 practical test. Still, you have to continue practicing it at the right time. Do not be complacent. Please take note of all these tips as they would be tested by the end of this term. If you have any questions to ask or any feedbacks, please leave them in the comments section.

--End Of Lesson 2--

2006-04-26T02:57:00.000-07:00

Chapter 1

Understanding what crap is.

Basically, crap would not be a nice word to use on others but it can be used to entertain and brighten up someone's life. Before you can do so, the most important element you would need is : trust.

This trust between you and your friends is important because with it, you may be able to share 'crap' and lame jokes with them. You wouldn't go up to a stranger and say crappy stuff to him/her because you do not know them well enough to crack this kind of lame and 'crappy' jokes on them. Please remember that 'crapology' is not for you to misuse the trust between you and your friends but to brighten and cheer up your lifes.

--end of lesson 1--